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Eurovision 2013

S

Steve_uk

Guest
The final will take place in Malmö,Sweden on Saturday 18 May 2013. Regular viewers will know there are also two semi-finals on 14 and 16 May,from which the Big Five (UK,Germany,France,Italy,Spain)are exempt. I won't go into why Russia with a population of 148 million has to qualify in the same pot as San Marino with 32,000 inhabitants,nor will I delve too deeply into the United Kingdom selection process which has imposed 1976 Lost in France singer Bonnie Tyler on an unsuspecting and increasingly frustrated British public with its usual benign transparency. Some might wish she had been left in a fog in the Ardeche,but I will leave readers to judge for themselves.
 
To sustain interest in what will be a dreary contest I'm posting the favourite now. Denmark's Emmelie de Forest stays just this side of catatonia as she sings "Only Teardrops" in her nightie and if you don't like this song then you may as well shed your own tears because they don't get any better. It's not worth backing though as the odds are lousy.
 
The host country Sweden will be represented by Robin Stjernberg,who makes up with vocals what he lacks in looks. Again I'm clutching at straws but I have this song in the top 5.
 
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One of my personal favourites this year is Georgia's with the odds at 22/1 sure to lessen. It has overtones of the 2011 Azerbaijan winner and Denmark's song from 2010. .
 
The San Marino entry takes me back to the heady days of the 1970s and for that reason alone I place this entry highly.Another song where odds will shorten.
 
Cheap vocals and background music,yet Norway's song has been hyped up to second favourite.
 
Is the Netherlands entry a haunting melody or a facile attempt at composition by a graduate has-been musician sitting at the piano? After eight successive failures at making the Final this song will sail through the semis and should be a top 5 finisher in Malmö.
 
Russia will be represented by talented singer Dina Garipova,but the song reminds me of Chiara's 2009 entry which also flopped on the night.
 
Ukraine's Zlata Ognevich can't decide whether she's supposed to be singing a classy song in the mould of Linda Martin or some tacky Disney track.It doesn't work to my mind. 4th favourite in the betting.
 
Germany's Cascada is younger than Bonnie Tyler(who isn't?)but this song is just last year's Euphoria transposed in a different key.
 
Will Italy's Marco Mengoni sit at the piano like his compatriot Raphael Gualazzi in 2011 or take the easy way out? Either way this is a classy song which should again finish in the top 5.
 
A young Omar Sharif sings the classy song we have come to expect from oil-rich Azerbaijan,though it's a pity he forgot to wear the suit.
 
Belarus will qualify with pretty young woman Alyona Lanskaya,but I can't help thinking the composer has borrowed parts from Turkey's winning song of 2003.
 
Rick Wakeman's Icelandic lookalike cousin with hair I used to have ten years ago sings what to me is another Shrek-type backing track..
 
There must be ten times more pressure on any entrant from Ireland than anyone else,but they haven't won for 17 years and they won't win again with this,even though it's a cool,pleasant song.
 
Finland's Krista Siegfried sings a Miley Cyrus/Britney Spears number which is maybe just a little too young for her.
 
All credit to Armenia for standing out from the crowd,but he might get his peace message across better if he stopped jigging about and his girlfriend changed his wardrobe.
 
A disappointing entry from Serbia. When the glamour of the backing singers has been stripped away it sounds too much like the backing track to some second rate Japanese movie.
 
Austria hasn't much to live up to(well not since Udo Jürgens in 1966) but this shallow song would be rejected even as a pan scrub commercial.
 
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